As there are no doubts hundreds (maybe even thousands) of school children bent over laptops writing about what they did over half-term, I thought I might as well join them. I should love to be able to report that I accomplished what I’d set out to do, which was absolutely nothing. I reckoned that as most of the country’s teachers were (supposedly) having a break, I could do so too. Unfortunately, a malignant Fate, to use Dornford Yates’ wonderful phrase, decreed otherwise.